Understanding the Narcissist, His Self-love

Understanding the Narcissist, His Self-love examines and defines a narcissist, and God's condemnation on self-love.

Understanding the Narcissist, His Self-love examines and defines a narcissist, and God’s condemnation on self-love.

See Characteristics of Narcissists

When you read the news, many times you just do not understand why people do what they do, and why they say what they say. There is just a total different way of thinking about things that what “normal people” think and say. A lot of the difference (or sameness in some cases) depends on how egotistical and narcissistic you are. Therefore, to understand the world and the news, you really need to take a deep dive into what a narcissist is, and how they think.


When you see so many opinions in our day, these opinions come from many different people with many different points of view. It is hard to understand exactly where a person is coming from, and where they are going with their discussion of some topic. At times, people are very convincing at some point.

But when you understand what a narcissist is, he is a person that loves himself more than anything else, then you see how his opinion is a tribute to himself. You can easily reject his premises and conclusions.

The Definition of a Narcissist

A narcissist is somebody who has rejected the God of heaven, and he has enthroned his own self in God’s place.

Once you understand that the narcissist is against God, then you can understand why God is against narcissism. Satan is the supreme narcissist of all time. He exalted himself above God himself (and everybody else), and God has cursed him. Narcissistic people are people who are against God’s principles. For example, a narcissist showers himself with self-glory, self-praise, self-worship, etc. So these characteristics (of narcissists and of people that are the opposite) tend to group and oppose one to the other. The opposite of a narcissist (in love with himself as his own god) is humility. Instead of asserting one’s self, trampling others in the process, a humble person is the example of gentleness and service to others. The narcissist only serves others when it serves his purpose of being exalted in the eyes of others. In other words, if others are watching, or he can tell them afterward about his own greatness, he serves. If nobody knows of his service, he doesn’t want to do it.

Matthew 6:5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

Narcissism breeds hypocrisy. The key take-away is that the mind of the narcissist is always wanting, craving, demanding, and working to get himself the exaltation of men (“that they may be seen of men“), and he ignores God for the most part. The narcissist has no fear of the Lord. Part of his personality is that he ABSOLUTELY HAS TO EXPRESS HIMSELF, what he is, what is has done, what others under him or identified with him have done, what are the achievements and successes of his family, his church, his business, his political party, his country, etc.

While we observe that God does tell us what He is, what He has done, what is His character, etc., God never brags about Himself. In other words, there is an element in narcissists and Satan their king to make the point how much lower others are in comparison to themselves. They are exalted, they are elites, and the rest of humanity is nothing, so the rest of humanity are their servants, their stepping stones to more glory for themselves. They deserve other worshiping and serving them. Other people exist solely for the purpose of the narcissist. They are worshipers of the greatness and benefit of the narcissist. If they get in the narcissist’s way, or bother them, then they become disposable deplorables. Even existing somehow in the same world with a narcissist is difficult for normal people.

The Character of a Narcissist

We can further identify the character of a narcissist to pin this personality down exactly. The picture of Isaiah 14 is when one day Satan will physically enter hell, and the reaction of those inhabitants of hell to the supposed “greatness” of Satan. This Satan presented himself as being great, but God has brought him down to hell in a humbling action that shakes up hell!

Isaiah 14:10 All they shall speak and say unto thee, Art thou also become weak as we? art thou become like unto us?
Isaiah 14:11 Thy pomp is brought down to the grave, and the noise of thy viols: the worm is spread under thee, and the worms cover thee.
Isaiah 14:12 How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!
Isaiah 14:13 For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north:
Isaiah 14:14 I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High.
Isaiah 14:15 Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.

When you read this passage, there should be some elements that should stand out to you, but if not, I will list them for you. Read my observations and read the passage again. The first thing we observe is Satan saying, “I… I… I…“. A narcissist has his mind stuck in the groove of “I am…, I did…, I proclaim….” When a person speaks excessively about himself, or very powerfully, loudly, with much emphasis about himself, he is probably a narcissist. Most common and most easily observed is when he always resorts to stories about himself and his family, his own achievements, so it is either about himself, or about somebody that can in his mind be included in his world.

Proverbs 27:2 Let another man praise thee, and not thine own mouth; a stranger, and not thine own lips.

The narcissist is pure arrogance. Arrogance has the element that a person IS BETTER THAN someone or something else, even if it is just the world in general. Arrogance is an issue that must be pushed onto others always. They are inferior to “me”. Great people do not need to praise themselves. These great people know they are great, and they are great because they have done something or are something in the eyes of God, and nobody else matters. Great people will never self-praise themselves.

2 Timothy 3:2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

Note that Paul instructed Timothy that “in the last days,” there shall be these types of people. Narcissism brings with it a multitude of other sins, all of which are typical of life in rejection of God, the last days. Note that covetousness accompanies narcissism, because “since I am so glorious, I should only have the best of life in my life, so all luxuries and even vices are valid because I am so great.” You cannot get two narcissists together because there is no place big enough for both of their egos.

1 Corinthians 13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
1 Corinthians 13:5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

Charity is love, and love for others is the exact opposite of love for one’s own self. True love does not envy, nor does it exalt itself. It is not inflated or puffed up. The person with love as the basis of his personality does not go beyond reality in evaluating himself, his own abilities and talents, etc. Even if a humble person is great, they don’t care that the world recognizes their greatness, they are content with whatever God says about them in the end of their life.

Soldiers at Rest
Soldiers at Rest

True love does not boast. Boasting is to beat down the person of others using the glory of one’s own self. Think of soldiers after a battle. If all of them fought and survived, then they are all capable at some level. But what good does one soldier boasting of his own achievements do? The future may prove how foolish his boasting was. The next battle, he may die. It was God that brought him through the fight alive, and although he had to fight and expend himself, many are dead around him, and they fought but died. There is a feeling of smallness after surviving a fierce battle. Soldiers surviving fierce fighting don’t brag or boast of their achievements. Moreover, their fellow soldiers are probably a great part of their survival. Because the other soldiers all fought fiercely, this soldier survived. One is grateful to be in the company of fierce fighters, and we are foolish to compare ourselves to others to get some kind of emotional boast of how great and glorious one is.

More Articles on Narcissism

The Political Elites

I read several months back of a billionaire that has built himself a fort in Hawaii, complete with walls, with doctors and nurses, an operating room, and even gardens to grow his own food. Of course, being a billionaire, he won’t grow anything himself, he won’t get his own hands dirty, but rather he will have servants living with him there to serve him in case of the end of the world. To really understand what these people are, they are narcissists. They are their own gods.

Many of the policies and politicians are completely absorbed in their own power, control, glory, etc. They make the laws that others have to obey, but they themselves are free from having to live under those same laws. That is the key. That is why there is so much corruption in politics. It is because they can take whatever they want, whenever they want, they just need to hide it. Why? Because the lower people under them always want to take them to task for their greatness, and so they hide any luxury, excessive pleasure, or vice from them. Hunter Biden, for example, with his drug use. Nancy Pelosi in the height of inflation and Covid invited a reporter into her kitchen to see her thousands of dollars of huge refrigerators filled just with ice cream (which was expensive ice cream). The point she was making is that she is a cut above normal people. While they were out of work, locked out by government laws, she was living the high life.

Understanding the Narcissist, His Self-love

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Author: Pastor Dave

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